Wednesday, May 6, 2009

The Gates of Fire: Synthesis

Novel: Gates of Fire by Stephen Pressfield

Poem: "The Winners' by Unknown


Synthesis Paragraph


"Beyond the baffling fog and mist," are the stalwart Spartans from "[The] Gates of Fire", "...whose names are written in the scroll," anonymously titled 'The Winners'. In this poem, 'triumph' is described in unrhymed free-verse as a 'gate' periled with "pain, loneliness and hate" (line 3), that is passed by only the victorious and perseverant at heart.


Pressfield's Spartans are depicted as the "victorious and perseverant at heart" when they make their final stand against the armies of the Persian Empire atop rugged hills of Pelopenesia, where "pain, loneliness and hat[red]" consume the helot Xeones and his company of Spartans. Indeed, "The road is long, the dream is gone...The fighting heart still carries on..." atop the tempestuous slabs of Thermopylae.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Paris Peace Conference: History 12 Reflection



Supreme Chancellor of Funk Tyler Gomez (Jewish)offers His thoughts on foreign policy:



Shabbat Shalom,

A week has passed since the outcome of the Paris Peace Conference and I feel that, for the sake of clarity, I must contend with the intricacies of foreign relations in order to accurately reflect upon the matters of the symposium. Over the course of a week, I had the privilege of speaking with and to an international committee made up of over twenty different countries from all the around the world. It was our responsibility to come up with a set of peace terms after the German surrender. Before I get into the heart of the matter, allow me to first assert that while our conference may have been marred by the selfishness of many, we achieved what we set out to do. Grievous sins were acknowledged, reparation pledges were made and conditions were set in accordance with President Wilson’s fourteen points to ensure regional prosperity.

My personal experiences are detailed below:

I first walked into the conference with an open mind and a closed folder. An interesting chap dressed in the finest ensemble UNICEF could knowingly support promptly introduced himself as the ‘Master of Ceremonies’ and greeted us. At the time, I was sitting with a rather apathetic Austrian delegate, a giddy President Woodrow Wilson and the Sultan of Turkey, reviewing my notes. I was to (meekly) propose the founding of a Jewish superstate that would effectively serve as a buffer zone between Germany and all of Western Europe. This nation, which was to be called Israel, would also function as an international task-force run by a league of several nations, which I called ‘the League of Nations.’ Linnaeus ain't got nothing on me.

Allusionus Maximus



In the words of myself, it would be:

-A place of settlement and means of protection for the Jewish people.
-A clause for agreement between nations, united under the common interest of regional stability. (The betterment of international relations)
-A method of reparation for war-torn Europe.
-A buffer zone between Western Europe and Germany.
-An international task force governed by the League of Nations to resolve and dispute any foreign affairs within the region.
-An area for free-trade between nations, economic boom for the region. (Less costs for an individual military will result in economic equilibrium.)

If participation were an equation, it’d be (# of slides used) x (time spent talking), in which case, I’d clearly be number one. As head of the Jewish committee, I made an effort to adequately address the concerns of the world throughout my ten minute presentation by means of transparencies. It should be noted that by the end of the conference, the world and I were in one accord. The only opposing countries were Germany and Palestine. How unexpected.

Indeed, while the fullness of my plan was not readily accepted (due to the fact that some people are selfish), the assembly of peace held between nations on March 2nd demonstrated that given the proper circumstances, conflict can be overcome by communication.

It was, as the Germans French say, perfect.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

A View on Humanity: Synthesis Assignment

Searcy writes,
"With reference to both "The Lottery" and "The Perils of Indifference," (use direct quotes) demonstrate that terrible violence and inhumanity can be demonstrated by the most "ordinary"
citizens. If you wish, you may conclude with a personal reflection on your own abilities to partake in acts resembling the ones mentioned in the story."



Jovial was the Saturday, the special Saturday that came only once a year to the ordinary townspeople of Shirley Jackson's short story, "The Lottery". While fictional, its citizens collectively compare to the seemingly 'ordinary' individuals that swore allegiance to the Third Reich of Hitler's day, as delineated by Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel in his famous speech, "The Perils of Indifference."

"The lottery was conducted -- as were the square dances, the teen club, the Halloween program," pens Jackson, "by Mr. Summers." Mr. Summers is described as a round-faced gentleman whom the people admired, with no kids of his own and a 'scold' for a wife. He ran a coal business in town that serviced the people and was, by no means, 'abnormal' in any sense of the word: he was a married working man that serviced the people, devoid of any secret identities that would label him a 'monster' or 'maniac' . Yet, it was Mr. Summers who conducted these "lotteries"- clear euphemisms for the selective stonings that would take place every year. Indifference, according to Elie Wiesel, is what "...spurs even the most civil into the most dastardly of folk."



Thursday, February 19, 2009

Mailbag Volume I: Superhero Edition



Dear Supreme Chancellor of Funk,

If you could have any superpower in the world, what would it be and why?

-Kate from Ohio
________________________________________________________
Thanks for writing Kate. If I could have any superpower in the world, it’d probably be the ability to punch people over the internet. (See defense below)


Justice

Now I understand that some of you freedom hating commie liberal readers may be a little uneasy about my decision, claiming that it's inhumane or just plain wrong to incite violence.

"What would Jesus do," I can hear them saying, "assuming of course that he did indeed exist because I am so liberal?"

Blessed are the evildoers, for they shall inherit my fist.


The defense rests.